It is because females have the chance of becoming pregnant and therefore less able to defend themselves and infants (in addition to having muscles that are less strong than males) human society requires chivalry to remain healthy. It is expected in human tribes that males are protective toward females and this is especially strong in romantic relationships. Without protection females are guarded against relationships and pregnancy. In this dog-eat-dog society where all are atomised and expected to have the ability "stand alone" society disintegrates, family life falls apart. Chivalry is not a nice "add on," but vital.
When I'm feeling triggered the world and everyone it is behind fifty feet of glass. Loving bonds become inaccessible. In this mode I have to take great care not to damage bonds of love, the relationships and people who are everything to my heart and soul. For in time the glass disappears and my love returns. I wish I could stop the triggering, but if I feel unprotected or left to fend for myself it returns - it is survival mode, cold and indifferent. Yet even in these times I am cognisant of my morality. I still make good choices. I can still imagine what the better version of me would want me to do and then carry that out. I can't undo the trauma I've been through, but I can adapt and overcome.
I am in S.A.M (Stand Alone Mode), that is what angel warriors need to do from time to time. The first time is the most challenging, after that small boosters are all that is required.
Stand alone mode was triggered by the universe because so much was at stake. Yet I agreed because it is my fight too. It is my purpose to defend whom and what I love. Yet I pray there comes a day when I can be with my co-pilot.
Emotional self regulation is an advanced skill, a real sign of brain maturity. That said, we should always co-regulate with others when we have the chance. The human "stand-alone-mode" costs our biology a small fortune in personal reserves. It is the hero mode. It is when the chief stands up and shows leadership and leans upon none.
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