banking institutions - quotes and descriptions to inspire creative writing

Dear Mr Richard Head,

Ahem. Ahem. It has come to the attention of the esteemed institute of wordsmiths, patent pending, that your banking institutions have been using the words of faith and affection for purposes quite alien to their original purpose. The preliterate societies may not have been able to counter this effectively, they are, after all, solid cerebral short circuits. Who can object to a bit of "saving up?" Ha ha. Well, we do. Effective immediately my good fellow cease and desist the use of the good place words and find some that better reflect the cold and indifferent manner in which you operate this fictional construct of yours.

We'll be checking in on you. We are sure we can bank on your support. In the great balance of life you'll do what's right and hold yourself to account. Well, gotta go, as they say, time is lives and we all only have a finite resource of that. For now I will rest my fountain pen in the holder, the teller will take great care of it. If you need any more tips I can always write you a note, promise!

Good oh, toodles, hugs!!!

Truthfully Mrs Peabody's (not yours),

Mr Peabody

Dear Mr Peabody,

After long consideration we would like to say that we are out to lunch and will be back later.

Yours Sin Sear Lie,

Mr Richard Head

"Sir! Sir! Is it true what they say about banking institutions? Sir!"

"What? What? Whom is speaking?... Uggghh, go on."

"Well, Sir, did they insist you shun and ban kings?"

"Who let this rug-rat in? What is this? Are you joking?"

"I'm not Joe, Sir. No Sir. I'm Oliver."

Ignore the 'standing armies' and pay attention to these rouges, these places were souls are sold for nickels and dimes. Pay attention to the places that rot science and hold their hands around the necks of angels.

Oh my gosh! You’re here! I thought up the best “get rich quick” scheme ever and it’s so simple, so easy. No work really, do you have a printer at home? If not, we can use mine. We’re gonna be richer than Warren Buffet before he got all charitable. Anyway, sit down, make yourself comfortable, I’ve got to be quick. Apparently we’re meeting Dakota soon. So here it is, we’re going to make a new currency called the Squid. Only we can print it, in fact, if anyone else prints any we’re gonna have then in jail for counterfeit, it’s only real when you and I make it.

Now here’s the cool part, when people don’t have enough Squids they come to us for a loan (with interest!) **exciting!** All we do is enter the number of Squids we lend them on a computer screen, no need to even print anything. Then they work their arses off for their whole lives to pay us back in Squids. But that isn’t the best bit of the plan, once we’ve flooded the market with cheap loans we say, “Oh no! Too much inflation,” and raise interest rates, make loans harder. Unemployment will rise and they’ll all start to default on loans. That’s when the real fun starts. We seize their property, houses, land, cars etc. Keep that going a few generations and our families will rule the world! Crazy, right? Oh, hang on, God’s telling me something.

He says that scheme was implemented a long time ago, in fact, that is how the global money system really works. He says there is plenty for everyone on Earth but I should tell you more about that another day. Shit. That mean’s we’re the slaves. Ah, well, I guess I’ll just go back to being God’s messenger angel then. At least saving the world means saving something real, right? I guess that means yesterday we were discussing if we should kill Kitty for digits on a computer screen. Is the whole world nuts? Sometimes I think it is.

I believe that banking institutions are more dangerous to our liberties than standing armies.